R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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