Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize