i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
