I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize
