and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
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