how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I'm at about main and main street
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
