She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Randomize
