I never want to see another naked old woman again.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
