Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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