i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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