She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Randomize