Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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