He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
