help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
