so that wasnt chicken after all
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
