I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
