That's intense
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
