If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
do herpes really smell.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
