so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
