I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Randomize
