I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize