i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I stole a fireplace last night.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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