is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
i out mim tonsoeep
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