is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
