He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Well I just put wine in my tea
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
