At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
