are you so shy because you have an std?
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
