Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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