Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
