i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
He is an equal opportunity slut.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
