to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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