I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
