On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
