I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize