Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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