this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
you are never too drunk for berry picking
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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