So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Your tits are I can't wait for
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
