I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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