can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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