I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize