which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
not ubering you a puppy
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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