i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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