Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
