Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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