I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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