Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize