the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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