mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
