12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
