I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
