Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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