The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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